As I am reading the book "A Woman after
God's Own Heart" by Elizabeth George, she's talking about the blessings
you'll receive once you enriched your prayer life. One of these is the confidence on your decisions. She said "Make no decisions
without prayer." You have to consult God first to avoid pleasing people
and instead seek for God's approval (Gal 1:10). Also, she mentioned that you
will have better relationships with people you are praying for, even your enemies.
But what called my attention is this
blessing. She calls it contentment. She said "If He doesn't
meet it, you didn't need it." Until now, I am still into the man who broke
my heart. During the time when we were on the rocks, I prayed and prayed. So
hard. I prayed that we fix our relationship, find our way back to each other
again and start anew. I prayed for him to stay. I told Him that I can't lose
him, that I'd do anything to make him stay. But even though I pleaded so hard
with full earnestness, we didn't end up being together. We broke up and remained
friends. It's hard. Really hard to be friends with someone you really really
love.
But Elizabeth said, "If He doesn't
meet it, you didn't need it." Maybe His answer was No or Not yet. Maybe because
He has other plans for me. Or maybe, I need to learn something before anything
else. Maybe He’s teaching me a lesson. Maybe He wants me to examine my
priorities. Maybe, I don't need him. Maybe he's not what I deserve. I know
someday I'll find someone who deserves me. Someone who would never hurt me.
Someone who is approved by God. It could be a man from somewhere. Or it could
still be him. Who knows? He knows.
Psalm 84:11 "No good thing will be
withheld from those who walk uprightly." He has better plans for me.
Better. Bigger. Bolder.
