I really don’t understand why some people dislike you even though you’re not doing anything against them. Yeah, you can’t please everybody but why try so hard to please them when you’re just trying to be yourself?
I know I’ve been a very good person. As far as I know, people don’t hate me. Well at least I know they don’t. They may not like me but at least, they don’t hate me. How am I so sure? I have this Formspring account and I keep on plugging it on my Facebook so that people would ask questions about me and eventually, know if there are people who hate me. So far, so good. No hate questions, just friendly ones. I don’t know if they’re just too lazy to ask questions or they’re not interested that much. Well at least they don’t hate me because if they do, they’ll keep on asking rude questions to piss me off.
Why am I saying this? I knew SOME people who find me objectionable. I can’t seem to find a reason why. I have a good family, I’m studying in a good university, I’m an honor student, I’m not ugly, and I’m not like any other EASY girls out there. I’m not bragging. I’m just saying because I don’t know why these people dislike me so much when I am not doing anything bad. Did they find my friends unpleasant that’s why they find me unpleasant too? I say, why do I have to avoid them when they’re doing nothing terrible against me? We may have similarities but that doesn’t mean that I am exactly like them. We may enjoy each other’s company but I don’t act the same way as they do.
If you’ll ask me, I don’t really give a damn about how these people or other people would think. I’m just really upset because I have been trying to please these people for quite some time when I don’t really have to. I don’t really try to please people. I’m not used to act as someone because people want me to act like one. I’m not a puppet and for God’s sake, it’s the 21st century people! Get on with your lives and start living in a modern world! If you can’t, go back to being ancient but never try bringing other people with you because they’re not like you.
I’m just being me and being me isn’t bad. And it really hurts me a lot because I care for them so much that I have to exert an effort just to make myself pleasing in their eyes wherein honestly, I don’t know what particular thing made them dislike me, if there is, so that I would change it. It is like “Kahit anong gawin ko, feeling ko hindi talaga nila ako magugustuhan.” I don’t know where to start, what to change, what to do to change their perceptions about me. I just wanna be a PART of them. For them to accept me. I may have flaws but that doesn’t connote that I am a bad person. Yes, some people would say, no you’re okay with them, but the feeling when you get to meet these people is very different from what people say. They don’t like you. They don’t even dare to look into your eyes or even say “Hi” or even just nod and smile. No. They don’t do that. They never do that. Because they don’t like you. I may not be that pretty or lovely. I may not be that smart. I may not be that rich. But that doesn’t give these people enough reasons to dislike and reject me. They don’t know me. They don’t even know my achievements. So why do they have to act as if they know me that well? They’re being judgmental. But there’s nothing I can do. I have to respect them because that’s the right thing to do. I have to shut up and work and wait till the day they accept me. (If that day would come.) But so far, everything isn’t working well between me and these people. Even though at times I feel so hurt because every time I meet them, it’s like they wanna slap my face and say “WE DON’T LIKE YOU!”. Honestly, whenever I see them, it’s quite awkward. I don’t know what should I do, how should I act, do I have to talk to them or not? But after expecting that they will somehow glance at you and just smile, you will be disappointed because they’ll just leave without looking at you even just for a second as if you aren’t existing, and you never existed.
PS: You are not supposed to relate on this matter. These people are not just typical haters. But if you do, welcome aboard!